YouTube Launches “Premium Lite” Because ‘Premium’ Didn’t Have Enough Asterisks

In its ongoing mission to create the world’s most baffling subscription model, YouTube has just introduced Premium Lite—a new, “more affordable” way to watch most videos ad-free for the low, low price of $7.99 per month. That’s right, you can now pay to almost have a premium experience, just without all those fancy features like background play or ad-free music. It's like buying a “sugar-free cake” or ordering a “low-fat” Frappuccino—technically the thing you wanted, but stripped of everything that made it good.

For those keeping score at home, YouTube now has:

• YouTube (Free) – Comes with the privilege of being bombarded with ads every 45 seconds.
• YouTube Premium Lite – Removes most ads, but not much else.
• YouTube Premium – Removes all ads, lets you play videos in the background, and gives you access to YouTube Music.
• YouTube Music Premium – Just the music part, because why make it simple?
• YouTube Premium+ Ultra Max Pro (probably coming next) – Includes ad-free videos, background play, offline downloads, an AI-powered "Skip to the Good Part" button, and a handwritten apology letter for all the monetized garbage you sat through before you started paying.

YouTube claims this is all about “offering users more ways to enjoy content,” but let’s be real—this is just a fun little pricing experiment to see how much money they can squeeze out of people without giving them everything they actually want. It’s like a gym offering a budget membership that lets you use the treadmill but bans you from the weight room. Or a car lease where you get a steering wheel, but air conditioning costs extra.

And let’s talk about the name: Premium Lite. Can something really be “premium” if it’s also “lite”? That’s like ordering a luxury vacation but being told your room doesn’t come with a bed. Or getting a VIP concert ticket that lets you watch from the parking lot. It’s either premium, or it’s lite. Pick one, YouTube.

So, congrats, YouTube. You’ve done it. You’ve finally made choosing a subscription service more complicated than picking a health insurance plan.