Monzo Tackles the UK’s Most Taboo Topic: Asking for Your Money Back

British digital bank Monzo thinks you're too British to ask for your money back, so it built an app to do it for you.

Monzo Tackles the UK’s Most Taboo Topic: Asking for Your Money Back
“When you’d rather lose £15 than make eye contact while asking for it back — thank god Monzo built an app for that

Happy Monday! British digital bank Monzo thinks you're too British to ask for your money back, so it built an app to do it for you.

British digital bank Monzo has boldly announced it will return £3 billion to the nation's collective pockets—not through investment strategies, cost-saving interest rates, or a surprise crypto pivot, but via Monzo Split: a free feature that politely nags your friends for money.

According to research presumably conducted in a pub between passive-aggressively unpaid rounds, Monzo found that Brits lose an astonishing £3.2 billion each year because they're too polite to send a “Can you chuck me a fiver for that Uber?” text. Instead, we suffer in silence, absorbing petty debts like human Venmo sponges.

But fear not, Monzo is here to automate your social discomfort.

Features include

  • Single Split: Divide a dinner bill with the speed and precision of a passive-aggressive accountant.
  • Running Split: For those ongoing expenses, like house shares, group holidays, or that one mate who always forgets their wallet.
  • Automated Nudges: Because nothing says “financial maturity” like an app gently pestering your flatmate every Tuesday at 7 p.m.
  • Global Guest Support: Now even your friend visiting from Australia can be subtly harassed by a British fintech app!

While Monzo insists the feature is free, users on paid plans get bonus abilities like importing expenses from multiple accounts—perfect for people who’ve turned “Sorry, can I PayPal you?” into a lifestyle brand.

Rejoice, Britain! Thanks to Monzo, the days of quietly resenting your mate for never paying you back for that Deliveroo are finally numbered. The fintech future is here, and it’s sending strongly-worded but very polite reminders on your behalf.