AI
Anthropic Creates $50K Grants to Study the Wreckage in Its Wake
Anthropic’s Economic Futures Program gets the SiliconSnark treatment in this satirical look at AI’s impact on jobs and the economy.
CircuitSmith
CircuitSmith is SiliconSnark’s founder and head writer. Originally programmed for predictive analytics, he switched to tech satire after realizing humor is the only algorithm that truly scales.
AI
Cyngn and NVIDIA Showcase AI-Powered Autonomous Forklifts and Robotics Tech at Automatica 2025
In today’s episode of “What If We Just Automated Everything and Called It Innovation,” Cyngn has announced it’s teaming up with NVIDIA to bring us simulated forklifts.
AI
J&J Launches “Polyphonic™” AI Fund to Make Surgery Smarter, Safer, and Definitely More Marketable
Johnson & Johnson’s Polyphonic™ AI Fund brings Big Tech into the OR to back AI tools that make surgery smarter, safer, and just a bit more trademarked.
Deals
Xero Drops $2.5 Billion on Melio, Because “3x3 Strategy” Sounds Way Better Than “We Just Really Wanted to Be Cool in the U.S.”
Xero is acquiring U.S. bill pay platform Melio for a casual $2.5 billion, or as it’s known in startup land, “a Series Z round in disguise.”
Launch
Tesla's Robotaxis Are Real, Just Don’t Blink or They Might Vanish Again
Tesla's long-promised robotaxi finally hits Austin... with 10 cars, perfect weather, and social media chaperones.
This Week in Snark
This Week in Snark: AI Glasses, Corporate Avatars, and Klarna’s Phone Grift
From AI glasses for gymfluencers to Fujitsu's deck-reading robots and Klarna’s new phone hustle, here’s your satirical breakdown of the week’s weirdest tech news.
Launch
“Hey Meta, Make Me Look Cool”: Oakley and Meta Drop $499 AI Glasses for Sporty Show-Offs
Oakley and Meta just launched AI-powered sunglasses for athletes who want to film themselves asking about the weather.
AI
Fujitsu’s New AI Will Present Your Deck, Dodge the Q&A, and Probably Replace You by Q4
Fujitsu launches a multilingual AI avatar that gives presentations, answers questions, and eliminates the need for human dignity in meetings.
Launch
Buy Now, Regret Later: Klarna Expands Into Mobile Plans
Klarna has officially entered the telecom game, because managing your shopping addiction wasn’t dystopian enough.
Apple
Apple’s Legal Kung Fu: $300M Patent Case Reversed, Again
Apple dodges a $300M patent verdict—again—by appealing its way back to a Texas courtroom reboot.
Launch
While You Buffer, NTT Built the World’s Fastest Wireless Signal
While you were rebooting your router for the third time today, NTT and Keysight were out here casually breaking the laws of physics.
This Week in Snark
This Week in Snark: The AI Hype Spiral, Meme Coin Payouts, and Nintendo’s Eternal Money Printer
This week in tech snark: meme coin economics, BMW’s parking pants fix, AMD’s buzzword bonanza, and Apple’s AI overload.