IonQ Acquires Seed Innovations to Make Quantum Computing Act Like Software

IonQ says its Seed Innovations acquisition will help optimize quantum performance at scale. SiliconSnark translates what that actually means.

Huawei Launches a Running Watch That Basically Thinks It’s Eliud Kipchoge

Huawei’s latest running watch partners with Eliud Kipchoge to deliver elite metrics, fatigue prediction, and the quiet judgment of a very smart wrist computer.

Edge Computing Goes to Orbit as Sidus and Maris-Tech Prepare LizzieSat-4 for Launch

Sidus Space and Maris-Tech announce a LizzieSat-4 integration milestone. We unpack what this actually means, why it matters, and why boring progress is good news in space.

This Week in Snark: Acquisitions, Constitutions, and a Grill That Knows More Than You Do

This Week in Snark covers Nvidia’s GTC 2026 rumors, Capital One’s Brex deal, AI constitutions, smart grills, stealth mega-funding, and Greenland’s tech scene.

Deep Dive: GTC 2026’s Leaks, Rumors, and the Future According to NVIDIA

This definitive deep dive unpacks every rumor, roadmap, and leather-jacketed prophecy for NIVIDIA GTC 2026.

Capital One Acquires Brex: Founder Mode, Meet McLean, Virginia

Capital One is buying Brex for $5.15B, merging AI-native fintech ambition with big-bank scale—and proving fintech’s future lives inside banks.

Claude’s Constitution, Explained Like You’re a Human (Not an AI Philosopher)

Claude now has a “constitution.” It’s thoughtful, ambitious, and extremely long. We rewrote it in plain English—with jokes, analogies, and snark.

Weber Just Launched a Smart Grilling Ecosystem While Most of Us Are Still Defrosting

Weber unveiled its 2026 smart grilling ecosystem in the dead of winter. The timing is hilarious—but the tech, strategy, and execution deserve a serious look.

Humans&, Human-Centric AI, and the Art of Not Mentioning a $480M Seed Round

A human-centric AI startup raises $480M at a $4.48B valuation—then launches without saying so. Welcome to the mega-seed era.

The First-Ever Deep Dive Into Greenland’s Tech Startup Ecosystem

Greenland doesn’t have VCs or hype cycles, but it does have real tech solving real problems. We took the first-ever deep dive into its startup ecosystem.

This Week in Snark: Age Gates, AI Newsrooms, 300,000 Litter Boxes, and Other Signs of Progress

This week in tech snark: Roblox safety theater, AI in the newsroom, Meta’s metaverse flop, and why simplicity keeps beating hype.

A Deep Dive Into Roblox’s Age Verification Fiasco

Roblox says age checks will protect kids. Users say it’s buggy, invasive, and easy to bypass. Here’s what’s happening and why it matters.